TechNoir Games

29/08/2013

Top Tip:SKATEBOARDERS. Next time you come to a set of steps with a handrail in the middle, pick up your skateboard in one hand, grasp the handrail with the other and carefully walk down the steps. This way it won't be quite as painful on your bo****ks.

28/08/2013

Top Tip: MUMS. A strip of banana peel tacked to the bottom of children's shoes allows them to be towed effortlessly around supermarkets.

27/08/2013

Cat woman likes to whip..

05/08/2013

Admit it, it's true..

27/05/2013

Download this for your ipad or iphone.. I made everything except the music, which I stole off some bloke...

Get Awesome Robot on the App Store. See screenshots and ratings, and read customer reviews.

16/05/2013

Don't waste money buying expensive binoculars. Simply stand next to the object you wish to view..

15/05/2013

Convince strangers you own a dog by walking around holding a lead in one hand and a small bag of s**t in the other.

05/04/2013

EMPLOYERS: Avoid hiring unlucky people by immediately tossing half the CVs into the bin.

04/04/2013

SINGLE MEN: Convince people you have a girlfriend by standing outside Topshop with bags of shopping, looking at your watch and occasionally glancing inside.

03/04/2013

DRIVERS: Avoid getting prosecuted for using your phone while driving. Simply pop your mobile inside a large shell and the police will think you are listening to the sea.

31/03/2013

Olympic athletes. Disguise the fact that you've taken anabolic steroids by running a bit slower.

29/03/2013

CHEER loudly at 8pm each Saturday to fool the neighbours into thinking you have won the lotto.